Road to Better

Good Mornin'

Well, I reckin' we must be stuck in a pattern! Pretty much, same, same; warm, sunny and breezy. Though, the breeze is just a little stronger today and I'll bet, not so hot; kinda fresh and plumb from the south. And, it is funny, I don't know if I'm gettin' older or better, since my go round, '08, with my teeth, but yesterday, drivin' over to see the "doc", and it was hot for this altitude, 90 somethin', I actually considered how the heat was actually pleasant. Might sound curious, but I been noticin' my noticin' changin' recent; all kinda ways. Maybe it is a function of older, I don't know, never been this old before, but it does occur to me how, just maybe, my defenses and customs, my grid of "goods and bads" is wearin' thin and, maybe, it's exposin' me to things, more, just the way they are. Maybe a function of realizin' I am older and things do give out and I won't last forever, so I might quit complainin' and just appreciate a givin' day, whatever it has to offer; who knows, but it is different and not all bad, by any stretch.

Did have a nice visit with the "doc"; nice chat about how we got here, roads and lessons, books and inspiration, and then, come time, address the shoulder, I learned all kinda stuff about massage, east v. west, accupressure, accupuncture and castor oil. Accordin' to the "doc", indispensible for anyone over fifty; he said it's an anti-inflamatory.

Sure was a contrast to the day before; all day on the phone, callin' all over Northern New Mexico, tryin' ta figure, who might be able, help with my cataracts. I got a referral to the University Hospital in Albuquerque, but they won't help 'cause a where I live and where I live won't help 'cause a what I got and back to the University, who then might help if I got an appointment, but only next year and, if my appointments next year, it's too soon to know if they'll help and by then I won't be able to go, 'cause I spent all my money on the phone, find out if they'd take me anyway. Way I figure, by then I won't care about my cataracts, 'cause I'll have a nervous disorder from talkin' to all these folks on the phone.

So, lyin' on the table, next to a fine old gentleman, in a fine old house, starin' up at the beams and pine boards made up the ceilin', volumes of medicine and wisdom linin' the walls, the smell of burnin' mugwort, threads of smoke driftin' up to the beams, castor oil rubbed all over my shoulder, muscles convinced to relax, it did occur to me, "this is healin'; this is medicine! However it works, and whatever the explanation, my heart is sayin 'yes, we will get better!'".

So maybe it's comes back to the beginning, that part about gettin' older, "noticin' my noticin' change", 'cause somehow or other, it's more clear than ever, untill the heart is moved, nothin' will ever, really, get better.

"The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking...the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker." Albert Einstein

Have a great day!

Best,

jeune