And, yes, ya gotta love it; yesterday, sunny, dry and 60 degrees, this afternoon, thunder, lightin' and snow comin' in sideways.
Lucky I had checked up on the weather, and I spent the mornin' fetchin' some extra firewood; supposed ta be a few days, similar.
And, this mornin', I had a sort of vision, or maybe, just a little understandin', "eye of the heart" and all, but, it was some inspirin', in a back handed kinda way. Just occurred to me, how, when ever I get serious and muster my heart, creator/maker, whatever ya wanta call it/him/her, always seems to be right there, immediate, ready to respond; gently, quietly, but, oh, so surely.
So, it got me thinkin', how I must have fabricated a whole raft of finely crafted rationals and reasons, why I can't/don't live in that kinda close relationship, all the time; actually, excuses was the term that hit me. At first it was kinda confrontin' and that's a good thing, my mind, some parta me cheatin' my heart out of a much, much richer life, it oughta raise a question. Then I remembered, how much it takes to change and it made me relax; not forget, I hope, but relax.
Love really does have a pull, special you start talkin' about the maker; you're talkin' "hardy" stuff. And, like that poem of Hafiz, I was rememberin' the other day, where he talked about the "whirlpools awful roar", it can be a tad "hair raisin'"; all that power we might suppose and it could be all love?
I believe the maker is well aware of my rational, reasons and excuses and doesn't hold much of a grudge. Seems ta me, over time, he/she, musta got used to the fact that the love he/she "packs", is a LOT and us humans need some room and time, make peace with it all; learn to trust and enjoy. That, when we are "ripe", clear, sure and full of trust, we can take that ride, with complete appreciation; no fear.
Anyway, heck of a way to start a day, no? But, I hope I don't forget; and not just the patience, but equal my try. 'Cause I do believe, that life is for learnin', and patient or not, more and closer I can stand to the fire, more the warmth can speak to my heart and my heart can learn to trust.
Have a nice night.
Best,
jeune
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